I am trying to make a difficult decision. Perhaps you would like to weigh in with your infinite wisdom. . .
Having been a stay at home mom for the past few years we have to watch our money, not like when I was a single mom but still. There are so many things I would love to have. Like a pool, minivan, trip to Lake Tahoe. In August Lily is starting school and I am trying to figure out what I will do with my free time.
Option one: I change my major and become a math teacher. There is a local college very close to my house, reasonable rates that offers a degree to become a high school or junior high school math teacher. This has really always been my dream. As a child I always thought I would become a math teacher. I often tutor in math and have had success and enjoyed it very much. There is a real need for math teachers and schools located near my home. However, the pay in Mississippi for teachers is under 30 K per year to start and after 30 years experience the max one can earn is 38 K. I might be able to earn more than that at McDonald's. There are plenty of secretary jobs where I could earn more than that and start immediately without having to pay out to finish college. I worked as a secretary in the sales department of a television station and was promoted to traffic manager before I was married. I was successful and enjoyed those positions, with that experience and references I think I could obtain a decent paying office job right away.
Option two: continue on my path to get a degree in computer information science paid for by a student loan. With this degree the entry level positions don't pay that much but with experience I can make quite a bit of money. Especially in the web design and development field that I love. It does take quite a while to work your way up to having the experience necessary to get a good job but I could eventually have a great paying job. And I really love computer programming. I also sometimes have trouble working well with others and this would be more of a job where I get time to myself without having to deal with people. I am not completely sure that I could handle dealing with junior high school students and other teachers all day everyday. Teachers really don't have the option of hiding in their cubicle when they are having a bad day.
Option three: Start working immediately and earning money in whatever I can find. Maybe someone needs a traffic manager or a secretary. I could earn a decent living and combined with Jeff's check we would be sitting pretty right away. No debt from finishing school. All the money would be extra and above what we need to live so I could have all the things I dream about without having to pay out for a year of college before I even start earning money. I can always finish college when the girls are older or continue to learn computer stuff on my own. I have always wanted a degree but I am not completely sure it will offer me anything other than debt. Seems that there are plenty of jobs available making good money without a degree and the jobs available for people with a degree you don't necessarily earn more money. Not that it is all about money, perhaps it is about happiness, I am already happily married, great kids, lovely home, money would just be a little added frosting.
I am not certain but I don't know that having extra spending money would actually make me happier. We are very comfortable now, just don't have the ability to spend as much as I would like. Long term I am not certain, maybe I would be just as happy being a secretary as being a teacher or a web designer. I did love being a secretary. Lots of gossip time, not a lot of stress, cute clothes...
I also think that going to school would mean that I could be home for the girls to see them off to school and to be here when they get home. I could volunteer at the school and meet the other moms etc. I worry that working full time would take me away from being here for the family because Jeff works so many hours and is out of town a lot it is nice for me to be flexible. Especially with Lily in kindergarten and being away from me for the first time. I might have to be available for when she gets sick etc.
So what do you think, fulfill my childhood dream and become a teacher, become a web designer and take an initial hit to the pocket book but be able to be involved with family while going to school and eventually be able to make a good living, or go for the money right away and start having more access to life's little pleasures right away.
Feels like we are playing the game of Life. Mandy loves that game we used to play it all the time. Jeff is sick of listening to me go back and forth and never make a decision. So I have to expand my audience.
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13 comments:
I vote for number two. How much longer until you finish that degree?
You will need to be plenty flexible while Lily is still so young.
Remember, my advice is worth what you pay for it. :)
wow, those are some pretty big questions you are wrestling with!
i don't have answers, but i have two points to keep in mind:
1. are there web designing jobs available where you live? i have a friend who is moving to another state because he can't get a job here (for web design).
2. when lily starts kindergarten, she will suddenly be exposed to a ton of germs for the first time. chances are, she will be sick a lot, especially for the first year.
good luck making the decision -- you can always change your mind later if you don't like what you choose!
math teacher!
it's what you've always wanted to do, they have a pretty sweet schedule and it's always a job in demand.
Thanks for asking for my advice,lol, you know I enjoy dishing it out! First I always tell people to finish school, education is the one thing that no one can take away from you and a degree does make a difference. You may not see it right away, but you will. Also you might want to think about substitute teaching for the middle and high school. This way you will get to experience that age group and see if you really want to be in that environment. Then if you find that you do, once you have finished your degree, you can get certified temporarily as a math/computer teacher and the state will tell you what you need to do to obtain a permanent certificate..such as taking a few more math classes and taking the teacher's examination requirement. So that is my advice, you asked for it, you got it!
My opinion (for what it's worth) would be to keep plugging away at school but just a class at a time so you don't have to get a student loan, and then get a part-time secretary job so you can re-build your résumé after being out of the workforce for so long, and so you can make money to pay for school, and so you can still be home for your family most of the time. Seems like it'd be the best of both worlds? I'd also suggest staying on-track with your current major because even if you graduate with that degree I'm betting any high school would still let you teach math even without that specialized degree, and that way you have a choice of what you want to do when you finish instead of one or the other. It's nice to have so many options!
Any IT-related job will pay better than teaching, and be less hazardous (violence in schools). And you are more likely to be able to work from home. That said, web designers are a dime a dozen, so it may hurt your chances of getting a job. If you have a real knack for it, you can get work without a degree, which is nice.
You said you don't always get along with others, which can cause problems as a teacher, but in IT, people expect that.
As a teacher, you get good benefits/pension and three months a year off. But I've known many people who thought they'd love to be a teacher and hated it instead. It depends on the age group you're teaching, I think, because that directly affects the students' attention and enthusiasm. I would prefer teaching the very young or adults (university), and/or to teach in a private school. Public schools have too many problems, and excellence is usually not valued or rewarded, only seniority is.
I think perhaps go for the web design/computer programmer (lean toward programming if you can, it pays better, and you can work remotely more). You can teach nights or weekends at a community college if you want, or hire yourself out as a math tutor and get paid in unreportable cash.
Consider this - is it better to give up precious time now with your children in an attempt to acquire material things? You can acquire things later. You cannot recover time that is spent apart from your children. They will continue to grow whether you're there or not, and they will eventually leave.
Regardless, you will go where you are meant to go, and do what you are meant to do. If things fall into place effortlessly, that is where you are meant to be. If you must constantly struggle to do what you're trying to do, then that is a warning that you're on the wrong path. ;-) Good luck!
meno: thank you for weighing in I appreciate it very much. I have about a solid year of course work left.
mamadaisy: Thanks for weighing in I appreciate your wisdom and support. You have made some excellent points. My understanding of the computer industry is that you don't really need a degree to get a job and having a degree doesn't really get you a job all the time. It is more what you can prove that you know. If I get a degree in Computer Information Science I will have a wide array of jobs available to me anywhere, not necessarily in web design/development. I also want to say that I am better at the programming stuff than the artistic stuff. You are right if I am taking courses from home on line I would have continue to have the flexibility that I currently have in regards to the family. Of course I could always call in sick if I got a job.
Capello: Thanks for stopping by to help me out your wisdom is always welcome. You are right being a math teacher is my dream. I sometimes feel that I have a calling to be a math teacher because I am so good at it. But, when I say I am good at it that means I am good in one on one situations. I hated it when I taught daycare to preschoolers. I keep thinking that teaching math to junior high school students would be different than taking care of a room full of 3-5 year olds. The issues I had with aggressive behavior and confrontational parents would be the same I think.
Kimberly: You make some excellent points. Thank you for weighing in. I found out the req to be a junior high or high school math teacher here is to get the degree in math/educ and then take the cert tests. Or one can have a degree in anything and then take some more courses and then the test and be cert for only one year instead of five. I was thinking if this is what I want to do why not just do it the right way with the degree in math/educ from the beginning. Plus I would most likely learn useful stuff. I like your idea about being a substitute teacher. I am actually qualified for that job.
Lorelei: Thanks for your input. You sound like me a year ago. My problem is that I cannot afford to pay for school out of my pocket even one class at a time anymore. If I were to work and take one class at a time it would take me at least three more years to get my degree. I also worry that I am not a person who could work, go to school, and take care of the family. I could combine your advice with Kim and get a job as a substitute, take one class at a time.
Marvin the Martian: Thanks for stooping by your advice is very well thought out and appreciated. I have always put my family before material things. But, frankly it is getting old. I have been a mom for 17 years and am nearly 40. Perhaps it is a phase but I have been feeling a little green with envy about everyone else always having such cool things. I imagine that five minutes after I got all that stuff I would not even appreciate it anymore. I do enjoy my life and family. Just weighing my options. The computer stuff is a bit frustration because it does seem to me that the things they teach in school toward my degree are only the tip of what I need to know to get a good job in any computer field. I imagine that must be true of any profession.
Will lily be in full or half day?
That will make a difference. You've gotten good advice here but I agree, the first year of school you need to be flexible with your schedule because she will get sick.
Maybe you could volunteer at her school or in her class? It doesn't pay, no, but you will be around and meeting people. Maybe you could find a part time job that way through a school friend if all you want is a little extra spending money.
Good luck!
Thanks Sari, she will be going full day. I have no choice. I wish it could be half day.
I have no infinite wisdom for you beyond stating that having choices is a good kind of problem to have.
That and follow your heart. It matters most in the end.
When you look at the options, which one do you like the best? When you visualize the different senarios, which one shows you the happiest? You are one very smart woman, and I know that you will choose the right one. And if for some reason the one you choose turns out not to be the right one, you can always change your mind.
Here's my two cents.
Get a job that fits in with your life now. Don't try to think too far ahead. You don't know what will be alive for you and your family up ahead. You have a little girl and you need to be pretty available for a good while yet. Also, I find that if I try to make one of my passions into a job, it robs it of all it's pleasure.
With a grain of salt,
P-
Do what you love and love what you do.
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