Yesterday, Jeff took care of Lily for me all day long. It was a nice break for me. She has been very diffiucult since I registered her for Kindergarten.
Lily is not a person who enjoys change and the anticipation of this change is causing her to act horribly. The entire week was filled with screaming crying fits. Sunday was no different, she was horrid to her dad all day. He was so furious.
My sweet husband almost never loses his cool but yesterday he was more frustrated than I have ever seen him. I couldn't help but think, yeah. I am so glad that he gets what I am going through on a daily basis. When he comes home from work and asks how was your day, now he understands when I tell him it was a bad, very bad day. That is all that matters, that I feel understood.
Now I am back in the trenches getting Lily through this difficult time. My theory is patience, routine, firm boundaries, and so much fun she forgets to be bad. It is a lot easier for me to go through the daily grind knowing that my dear Jeff understand and appreciates me.
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It's a sweet feeling to know that he finally understands how hard it is to care for a small person all day.
That's why I look forward to my girl's only days...I get a break, Jake gets a break from me and Bob gets to put his feet into my shoes, so to speak. There are some great books out there about Kindergarten, definitely recommend Kissing Hand, it is about a Racoon going to school and his mom kisses his hand so he always has his kiss in his hand to put to his cheek, even says it is okay to wash your hand, the kiss will still be there. It will make you cry! But there are other good books that will give Lily an idea of what to expect from Kindergarten. If you want there names let me know and I will get a list out to you.
meno, yes, I like to feel understood.
kimberly, yes, I would love a list of books. Great idea.
It's always good to feel understood.
You mean you registered her for the fall? My kids have a hard time seeing things two weeks from now, let alone 3-4 months! It's always good for Daddy to get a taste of what Mommy goes through every day! :-)
TTYS- Sniz
What a lovely post. It's so nice to have a real "partner in arms", across the board. Nicer still when you know their empathy comes from a place of real understanding.
And also? In my experience, the children who fear the change and balk the most at going to school end up being the most resilient and enthusiastic in the end. It might take a while, but take heart.
What exactly is she acting out about? Does she not want to go? Leave you everyday? Or is there something else bothering her?
elle jaye: yeah
sniz: yes, I registered her for fall and I think that a big part of the problem is that we talk about her going to school but it never happens, the anticipation that never ends. She doesn't understand that it is a long time off. It felt wrong to not speak of it until the last minute. I am trying to get her as prepared as possible. I want her to have a good experience.
Jennifer: Lily is excited about school and riding the bus and being away from mom and independant. Her behavior last week make me think that underneath her bravdo she was perhaps worried. It was a hard week. After repeated assurances she seems to have rallied and gone back to being her 4 year old self.
Eally: good question. I don't know really what was bothering Lily. What I do know is that any change in her life causes her to have behavior problems, things like driving a different route to a familar place, or saying something different like time for bed, instead of time for sleepy night night. When life isn't exactly the way she likes it and is comfortable with it she freaks out and has huge melt downs. Yesterday she spent two hours cleaning up the science museum where we attend a playgroup on Tuesdays. She would rather not play until the toys are all in their proper place. School will be pretty structured but new situations and Lily don't mix well. I just want her to have a good experience, perhaps because my kindergarten experience was so awful...you can read a little bit about that experience here
my daughter is the same when faced with change. My husband doesn't do well with it. haha.
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