At the end of October Jeff's best friend Chad is coming to Mississippi to live with us for six months. He is a general contractor and came down with his church for a couple of weeks over the summer. After seeing the need for help in rebuilding homes two years after Katrina Chad decided to spend the entire winter here helping. He feels that having someone who knows what they are doing, someone who has a plan, will enable all the people who do come down to do work the opportunity to do the most good. Right now it is a mess. People come down and don't have the leadership necessary to get things done efficiently.
We wanted to help Chad in his efforts to make a difference in the world. For the most part he will be staying over in Pearlington with his church group, but on weekends he will come over here to try and find some paying jobs, and he will live with us rent free. That way he wont have to earn quite so much money and can spend more time doing volunteer work.
Sounds like a good idea, but it also sounds like it could go wrong in so many ways. One thing is for sure, if we don't tell Chad about my blog I can tell you exactly what I think of having Jeff's best friend in our home for six months. I told Jeff I hope our marriage survives this and he gave me a look like I killed a puppy.
Jeff: I asked you before I invited him.
To Jeff this means, I have consented and no matter what I cannot get upset about anything because, he asked me first.
We currently cannot afford to do a bunch of stuff I want to do, like paint the trim on the house, plant some grass in the bare spot in the back, get some entertainments center and book cases... I have a list a mile long of things we "need" for our new house. But, buying a new house, going to college, me not working, we have no money for these things. But, with Chad coming we all of a sudden have the money to turn our garage into a bedroom for Chad. See, I said Chad could come so this means I cannot get mad that we are spending money on Chad and not me.
Jeff saw this one coming and offered to let us spend some money on the house this weekend. So now we have no money, but we are spending money on the house and on Chad. Where is this money coming from? College... I could be taking more than one class at a time. See how selfish I am. This giving up space and money in order that Chad can make a real difference to a whole lot of families is hard for me.
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8 comments:
It will be hard. It always is when someone comes into your life and interrupts its daily routine. But keep in mind that you are making difference for these people who truly have a need. You are making a difference by helping out Chad so that he can help them. There is nothing wrong with your concerns, they are all valid, but before you get upset when something goes wrong, ask your self is this incident worth getting upset about and remember what those families have been going through for 2 years now. Good luck, I know it will be a struggle...but it will be worth it in the end.
Thanks, Kim.
Marsha -- you can come visit me if you need a break.
Katya, thanks- we need to plan a get together. I am almost always free.
I think you're doing a great thing inviting Chad into your home for this purpose, but I would venture a bet that many a church would find a wonderful home for him, too -- it doesn't necessarily HAVE to be yours.
Maybe Chad can help with home improvement jobs around your house instead of paying rent...?? Not anything MAJOR, but if it's little things and that's what he's good at, I would think it would be great if he offered to help you guys with a few small projects in exchange for living rent free.
It's always tough to make a sacrifice, no matter how good the cause. Don't feel bad for feeling the way you do, it's normal.
Marsha -- we do need to plan a get together.
Why did you agree and now have changed your mind?
My suggestion would be to change your mindset and see this as a positive, especially since it is temporary.
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