Confused and Amused: I'm Glad I'm Over 30!
So funny, you must read this.
Mandy loves the TV show Smallville, have you seen it? A young Superman, with a really hot actor. So the other day when the movie Superman with Christopher Reeves came on we watched. Mandy had never seen it, weird the events of my life that are not a part of Mandy's life. Watching I noticed how Lois acted the whole movie and it reminded me of how most women were portrayed in TV and film back in those days. Annoying, dumb, weak and in desperate need of a savior. Pretty annoying.
Many of the TV shows popular today are the same, women are portrayed as being the stereotypical annoying bitch. Like Deborah in Everybody Love Raymond. I really hate her. How she is such a spoil sport, no fun, a real bitch. My family, I try to explain to them why there are shows I won't watch, Like Raymond. I don't care if it is funny or not, it just really makes me mad so I don't watch.
I remember back in the mid 90's, listening to Rush Limbaugh for the first and only time on the radio. I remember him referring to women like me as femme-Nazis. That's me a rabid femme-Nazi. I get really upset about these seemingly small details.
Mandy is taking an etiquette course at school right now. They believe it is important for our future kids to be aware of proper etiquette. This will help them in their business life. One aspect was that Mandy had to go to a formal dinner with her dad, all dressed up. And Mandy had to properly introduce him to her friends, teacher and to a high ranking base official ( in years past it was a general, but not this year). The next day she had to perform various tasks, and I had to sign a paper saying that she had done the tasks. Tasks like setting the table.
The thing that bothered me was that in this etiquette course they gave specific instructions as to how girls should act and how boys should act. It really bothered me. Would it be ok for them to say, all the black children your etiquette is this, and all the white children your etiquette is this... Then on this worksheet where I have to initial that Mandy did her tasks they asked me to give comments. It was actually worth 4 points for me to give comments. I really wanted to give some femme-Nazi comments. How dare they teach my daughter her proper place. How dare they suggest that in a business setting she should behave differently than the men because, what she doesn't have a penis. So mad.
Mandy told me to get over it. She said that it is important for her to know this crap. What if she is on a job interview and she started going off about feminism crap, would she get the job? So I wrote in the comments section
Mandy appears to know more about etiquette than me.To be honest, the reason I don't work is by enlarge due to the fact that all of my working experience has been up until this point so completely nerve grating due to sexism that I cannot function in my role as wife and mother. I come home so pissed off that I just don't shift well into being a nurturing type person. Now, not working being a wife I am treated so well by everyone. I love it. I know that it is in and of itself disrespectful to be nice to me the non-working Marsha and be mean to the working Marsha, but I like the nice. Someday I will re-enter the work force and be treated again like a dog. My ideas will be dismissed while penis boy will be treated with respect. I will do my best to change the hearts and minds of the penis boys about how smart and competent women are, and hopefully improve the quality of work place treatment so that when my girls enter the work force they will be treated better. But, for now I am enjoying the break from the battle of the sexes.
Ten PM last night I found myself laying on the floor next to Lily's crib in the dark, with no pillow or blanket. Lily had slept so much during the day that she was having trouble falling asleep. I didn't want to let her cry it out with a head cold. This was working for her, she was content to play in her crib in the dark as long as I was there with her.
At first she jumped around, sang songs, and tried to get my attention any way she could. Eventually she settled down and laid her sweet little congested head on her pillow, covered herself with her blanket and settled down ready to fall asleep. In the darkness of the room I could see a bit of light reflecting off her enormous blue eyes. We laid there: me frozen on the floor, her nestled into her comfy quilt; staring into each others eyes. Each of our minds wandering away to distant places.
That is when I heard the first thump. A pause of about a minute or two and then I heard another thump. I knew exactly what that thumping was. Something Little Miss Lily inherited from her father. Something she has never witnessed him do, but inherited none the less. You see those two weirdos, Jeff and Lily, they lift their foot and let it drop to the bed, thump, while falling asleep. I continuously amazed at how many of her little quirks are inherited from her DNA.
When Mandy was little I was convinced that everything she did was due to my parenting, the good and bad were a result of me, me, me. Now I know that they are who they are. The best I can do is give them a safe loving environment to enjoy their childhood. They are going to become whoever they are going to become and I am going to love them weirdo quirks and all.
Your Linguistic Profile: |
65% General American English |
15% Dixie |
15% Upper Midwestern |
5% Midwestern |
0% Yankee |
I lost two pounds! One week of going to the gym everyday for a half an hour and I lost two pounds, very exciting stuff.
My feet, back, and heel are still hurting; even with new $50 running shoes. I am also feeling like crap emotionally. I thought exercise was supposed to make me happy. I am feeling worthless and snapping at everyone, I don’t think I have been this miserable since I was Mandy’s age. Plus, my period is all wonky. I think my fat is mad and using psychological warfare against me. Just wait until I give up sugar, one more week until the diet starts.
Lily and Jeff have colds, our trip to China is in about a week, so I guess my body is waiting for then to contract this cold. We have to get typhoid shots, I am not sure if I should wait until Lily is feeling a bit better or go ahead and give it to her now. I shouldn’t have procrastinated the shots, but I heard that typhoid shots really hurt and I am such a baby about needles. Lily and I have to get the second shot for Hep A as well. I just hope that we are recovered from all our shots before we get on the plane.
We broke down and bought some furniture at the Bizarre. We spent a ton of money. Local merchants come from all over Japan, twice a year and sell us stuff. We bought two small tables- that we said would be used as night tables in our room, a Japanese sword, and a lamp. The night tables we couldn’t bear to put them in our bedroom, so they are in our living room and our living room tables are in our bedroom being used as night tables. I will try to get some pictures of them to share. They are so very lovely. My table is Japanese and exquisite. Jeff’s is from Tibet. We spent so much money, but we will have these treasures to forever remember our time here in Japan. This is our second big splurge this year. We are being extremely awful with money. I just love to sit in this room with such beautiful things.
My exercise program is going ok. My back is much better, which is great. It usually takes about two weeks to feel better, but all this exercise must have helped because it is completely better this morning. But, now my achillies tendon and my arches are hurting. Jeff says I need new running shoes, does anyone have any recommendations? I have never found a pair of running shoes that works for me. When I was younger I used to run all the time and I never had any problems. So I am thinking it is the weight that makes my feet hurt and not the shoes. But, new shoes, who can say no to that? Still I have been to the gym three days in a row, and I went for a walk jog the day before that. So that makes four days of exercies in the same week.
Today Lily and I are beginning our trip training. I am taking her out and about all day on the bus. We are going to be doing a ton of walking, waiting, and even eat lunch out of my bag. I thought we needed some practice. Lily has been a bit wildfire lately and I am so worried about the trip.
Speaking of the trip, we got our passports back from the Chinese Embassy and we got our Visas to China. They are so cool, they have a picture of the great wall. I now have a Visa to Italy, Kenya, Egypt and China. Jeff has Vietnam too. The Visas to Kenya and Egypt were expensive but just a scrap of paper with someone's initials staped to my passport. Very economical. So we are set. Except we are freaking out about what to feed Lily and how she will behave. Should we bring a stroller? Should we bring our carrier? On our last trip we brought about 3 tons of luggage car seat, and a big yellow monkey - we drug it on and off six trains, two planes, taxi cabs, a cruise ship, a rental car, 2 motels -etc. It was hell. This trip we are tempted to just bring the clothes on our backs and a pair of underwear. (and some diapers, no luck on the potty yet).
Here on base they are having a "Biggest Loser" contest. Billy Banks is even coming for the kick off. To enter you have to have a team of four people. Jeff asked me if I want to do it with him. He doesn't need to loose any weight, but the winning team gets $2000 and he figures if we both do it, we get 1/2 the money because we would comprise half the team. I must have been on drugs at the time, because I agreed to do it with him. What a bunch of crap.
The contest starts on April 4th, so look forward to me being completely miserable. I wish the gym would pass out narcotics after a good workout. So far this week, before I knew about the dumb contest I have worked out twice, I am in so much pain. Anyways I am hoping that I will get all the pain over with before the contest, just get it out of the way. Well that is how I hurt my back, I am so out of shape that jogging threw out my back and caused me to have an incredibly painful stiff neck. Fun times.
So wish me luck, at becoming a big loser.
There are 50 band names hidden in this photo, can you figure them out?
For instance: Spashing Pumkins, The Eagles, Prince, The Rolling Stones, The Monkeys.
I stole this from Angel.
Help me to find some more!
Do you believe in pure good and pure evil? This is the question Jeff was trying to answer tonight for his homework assignment in his Genocide Studies course. He does, I don’t. We ended up discussing it long after the paper was submitted. I love that I am married to someone who enjoys blaviating with me for hours.
To sum up, Jeff believes that some actions are so heinous that they cross a line into being pure evil. Conversely some actions are so great that they cross a line into being pure good.
I can’t wrap my mind around it but to me that definition is too simple. I believe that everyone is capable good and everyone is capable of evil. The conditions that cause people to act outside of what we consider normal are around us everyday and to say only monsters act that way is to ignore and not fully consider other factors which could and do lead to acts of evil. Everyone now agrees that the holocaust was pure evil, but not at the time it was happening. Many otherwise good people turned looked away. There are things happening in our world today, things we turn our backs to because they are complicated and we don’t really know what to do about it, and those things we don’t think of as pure evil like the holocaust. Things like Katrina and poverty. Or when we go to war, what are our reasons? What were the reasons people commit genocide? Are those reasons and are those things the same or different? I think calling some people pure evil and then trusting others because, hey I know they are good people and not pure evil is the easy way, the
I am rambling, probably because I threw out my back and I have been in so much pain!
If you are still reading I have a funny antidote for a reward. One of the guys who works with my husband, his job is to administer hearing tests to people whose job it is to be near really noisy stuff. He tells me that he has noticed that married men cannot hear sounds at a very small range of frequencies, out of one of their ears. When he was working in the
My professor sent us a picture of the lawn chair she is sitting in, on the beach somewhere in Thailand. She has had to have knee surgery and decided that sitting at home in her living room recovering wasn't as much fun as sitting on a beach in Thailand. Since my class is via the Internet she is doing her job, getting paid, and sitting in the shade of a palm tree in Thailand. Such a life.
I got to thinking about vacations. I don't think I have ever had a vacation like that. Mine are very go-go-go. No sitting on beaches enjoying the view. No contemplating life. Go-go-go.
My job involves sitting on the living room floor in sweats, singing songs and doing puzzles. Maybe I am not really in need of a serene type vacation. Still, that beach chair looked mighty inviting.
Speaking of my job… Did you know that the melody/harmony (I don’t know the difference) of the ABC song and Twinkle-Twinkle Little Star are the same?
Lily told me by singing…
A.B.C.D.E.F.G ---
How I wonder what you are ---
Q.R.S.T.U.V. ---
Like a diamond in the sky.
She is a clever one. When I told Mandy how clever Lily is, Mandy said…”I’ve been telling you that for years, you never listen to me.” (insert door slam here).
Note to self: Don’t tell eldest child how smart youngest child is. (see how clever I am) It only took 15 years for me to learn how to communicate with the eldest child.
The birds are singing, the angels are playing their harps... The snow has melted enough for us to play.at.the.playground. Behind our house is the most awesome of playgrounds and we have had to look at it burried in snow for months, but today we played there. It was a magically moment. Lily and I were beside ourselves in happiness. She ran around the playground, her feet barely touching the ground, she was so delighted to play at her playground. Yeah.
We then had cocoa and a nap. All is right in our world.
Last week, or the week before I forget, we had another big dump of snow. In the morning I slipped on the ice letting the dog out. I then drove Jeff to work, and started shoveling. I had to quit shoveling after about a 1/2 an hour because Mandy was taking care of Lily and she had to get ready for school. So I went into the house before finishing my required shoveling duties. I was risking getting a ticket for not having my area shoveled but someone has to take care of Lily. I was in such a bad mood by then. The combination of the fall and the shoveling had caused every last inch of my body to be incredibly sore.
That morning I had to drive Mandy to school because she was bringing a project that was too bulky for the bus. About an hour after I had given up on shoveling the three of us, went out to get in the car and drive Mandy to school. We discovered that one of my neighbors had finished up my shoveling. I have no idea who it was but the shoveling was done. I was so grateful and delighted that it effected my entire day. The entire day I just enjoyed every minute. Lily and I laughed more than normal, we danced and sang and acted like nuts. That is typically what it is like living on a military base. One of the treasures of living on an overseas military base is that everyone is family. Even if you don't know someone's name, they are here and they are family. I cannot count the times someone has gone out of their way for me, a stranger or a friend. We embrace each other regardless if we would be friends with that person in a different circumstance.
This lead us to feel very safe in our community. Mandys spends the night at people's houses who I have never met. Girls whose parents have never met me spent the night here. Kids run the streets without supervision. It reminds me of when I was a kid, when you just went outside to play.
So when I read this article it really upset me. A man from my community has been jailed for downloading child pornography. A man with 18 years military service, a father, a husband, one of us. I realize that maybe that sense of security that I feel is false. I hate the thought of having to build a brick wall around my daughters. I hate that I have not escaped the ugliness of the world, that it is here and everywhere.
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