Jeff is Home

Thursday Thirteen:

1. Jeff got home on Sunday, July 4th. Which means that on the day he left I estimated he would be gone 190 days and he came home on day 190. He was scheduled to come home on Saturday. I got a call on Friday saying that he was delayed. I didn't hear from him again until Sunday and that was a long Saturday not knowing, when he would get home or where he was.
2. Having Jeff home is wonderful. I forgot how much I like him. I know that sounds predictable and whatever. He is nice to have around.
3. I really want to watch General Hospital but Lily is sitting in here reading a book. I would feel bad turning on the tv. Who taught that girl how to read?
4. I thought it would be an adjustment to have Jeff home, as we were paying the parking lot fee at the airport I noticed that it felt like he had never been away. The girls didn't have to adjust either. He has always had magical Jeff powers that make me happy and feel peaceful. I have never been able to be mad at him in person either. Weird.
5. Jeff's first day home he fixed a million things around that house that had vexed me for months, he sat and listened to Lily and played with her with as much love and affection as I have for her, he took the time to make sure Mandy felt loved and included even when she was being teenagery. I don't know how he does all those things. It was a relief of a stress that I had for so long I forgot I even had that stress to have my partner who loves and cares about all the things I love and care about, we have the same goals and the same priorities and two people working toward whatever it is we are working toward is nice. Felt like I had been pushing this boulder up a hill forever and now I have a big strong man standing beside me pushing too. Plus, he is always making me laugh along the way. All that happened day one. Yeah, now I know why I had such a hard time when he first left. Now I am really done gushing about how much I love my husband and how glad I am that he is home. Yeah, Jeff. But, just know that is more amazing than I can say or even comprehend.
6. So Jeff is on leave until August. That is a lot of time to spend with someone 24/7. Maybe by August I wont like him so much.
7. Lily finally learned how to really swim. She has been going to swim lessons all summer every summer since she was three. She has never been afraid of the water. She has always been able to surface, tread water, doggy paddle to the side. But, now she honest to goodness swims and you can tell what stroke she is doing. So yeah, Lily.
8. I haven't really blogged a lot lately. Lily has grown up a lot. When I started this blog she was a headstrong difficult child who had food allergies and a receptive language delay and a bad case of the scream all day. Doesn't seem like the child living with me now is even the same person. I don't know if she grew out of it or if school worked its magic but Lily is a really upbeat sweet girl. Her first grade teacher said that Lily is the definition of blissful. Wrote on her report card that Lily was so sweet and happy everyday that it made coming to school each day a joy. Even at the day care center at the gym they asked me if she is always this happy. She is also really well behaved. She likes to follow the rules and the schedule. It is nearly impossible to be around Lily and not be happy. She loves life. Whatever it was in her early years that drove her to fight every single rule and cry at the drop of a hat for every single thing, went away. She still gets frustrated by things, maybe more so than other people, but she has learned to let it go and focus on the good.
9. Mandy is doing really well too. She doesn't talk to me a lot though. She is doing excellent in college. She is driving her own car, that she bought, paying her own insurance and cell phone bill, she pays for some of her college and some of her personal expenses. She got promoted to a Customer Service Lead at work. She is respected and loved there. She never missed a day of school or work. She tells me where she is and when she will be home so I don't worry. She doesn't get upset if I text her, are you ok? When I don't know where she is. She babysits for me all the time. Especially while Jeff was gone. But, some days wow she is teenagery.
10. Lily is having a birthday party this year at the Y swimming pool. We made a list of all the friends she wanted to invite and I had to write out all the invitations and then find addresses for all those kids. A couple of the girls I didn't have an address for but I had an email for their moms. I sent an email with details of the party and asked for their mailing address so I could send them an invitation. One of the moms told me they could come to the party, but she didn't send me her address. Lily looks at that envelope everyday and it just bothers her. I tell her, they are coming they know about the party. But, still we wrote out an invitation, put it in an envelope and she wants so badly to mail it. It is funny. She has decided to keep it as a souvenir. Today, I said, do you just want me to call Gracie's mom and ask for her address so we can put it in the mail? Lily thought and said no, I can just keep it. Funny, but true, the other mom sent me a reply to my email including her address but telling me they cannot come. I thought that was odd too. Like why do you want an invitation if you know you can't come? Maybe she understands the concept of having written an invitation and just needing to mail the darn thing so you don't have to look at it anymore.
11. One time during a particularly difficult week during Jeff's deployment those same two moms drove me so crazy I sent them scathing emails and then ignored them for the rest of t-ball. Didn't even say hello or acknowledge them at all so I am surprised that they are willing to consider coming to Lily's party. These two were the moms at t-ball who thought everything the coach did was wrong. They decided that they were going to hold some extra practices because the coach wasn't having practices after we started playing games we just went to games and the girls didn't really understand what was expected of them. But, it is tball afterall. So they sent out the emails, come to an extra practice at this time and place. The first time it was only the three of us. The next schedule extra practice happened to be at the same time as the practice for the girls who wanted to be a part of the tournament tball. All three of us signed up our girls along with some of the girls for all the other teams and we were to have a different coach and start playing tournament tball. When I didn't hear for the new coach about the practice I asked the two moms if we were still planning on having the extra practice for our team at that day and time if there is no tournament practice and they said yes. A half an hour later I got a call from the tournament tball coach saying that practice was canceled. I had a PTO meeting, I was secretary and had to go so I asked Mandy to take Lily. I had actually asked Mandy to take that day off from work to take Lily. No one else showed. They said, well when the tournament practice was cancelled we just assumed it was all cancelled. So I was not very nice in the email I sent or for the rest of the season. I think the problem was that I was trying to do too much and be too perfect and that I tended to over react to things that annoyed me while I was under so much pressure. Anyways it is interesting if they come to the party. Lily loves the girls and she wanted to invite them. She has no idea that her mom is a crazy woman who sends nasty emails to her friend's moms.
12. While Jeff was gone I feel like I discovered a bit of myself that was missing. Friends. I have such a great husband who is my very best friend that I tend to not make a lot of effort with other friends. The girls and Jeff are a lot of work and who has time for friends? Well making an effort has really paid off. I love having girl friends. I like having a bit of a life outside of the family life.
13. The oil is here but not a lot of it. There were a few blobs that washed up and they were removed. I don't currently smell anything. It appears that there is a large effort to get it cleaned up before anymore reaches the shores. So far what has washed up is less than a gallon, at least as far as what I have personally seen with my own eyes. Of course there is oil washing up from Florida to Texas and my little beach is somewhere in the middle. We are also protected by barrier islands here along the Mississippi coast. I am not sure of what is out there or how far away it is. The water I see along our shores currently looks like water and the air smells like air. I see birds that don't appear to be covered in oil. We continue to wait and see.

Thursday Thirteen # 11

I have been trying to lose weight for 20 years, every year I seem to gain about 5 lbs over the course of the year instead of losing. Except this last year, I remained the same, and the year before I lost 15 lbs. I have tried many different diets (only free ones). Read many diet books (from the library). I feel like I should be a weight loss expert by now, except for the fact that I still need to lose weight. Here are some of the things I have learned...

1. If I remove treats from my day to day life, I need to replace them with some other type of reward or I feel punished. Books, magazines, shopping, calling a friend, I have tried a lot of things, but it is hard to find something to replace afternoon cookies.
   
   
2. If I give up sugar, flour, potato, and white rice for two weeks - I no longer have any hunger pains or cravings, ever. But those two weeks - require a padded room.
   
   
3. I hate breakfast, gagging it down sucks, all the skinny people I know in my real life do not eat breakfast.
   
   
4. I have to exercise every single day at the exact same time or I get off track and skip it.
   
   
5. If I go to the diabetic section of the store and buy a lot of sugar-free crap, it helps me get through those first two weeks of giving up sugar.
   
   
6. I think I am resistant to change. I find it really hard to give up sugar and white stuff and start exercising all at once.
   
   
7. I do a two week: before the diet actually starts period, where I get off the sugar and white stuff and I start to exercise. Except since I am not technically dieting yet, I eat sugar-free pies and brownies and I don't exercise-exercise I do low impact low effort-just get in the habit type exercise. It gets me in the mood.
   
   
8. Do you skinny people really eat breakfast?
   
   
9. Can you tell I am about to go on a diet? How fun is that?
   
   
10. Do you have any recommendations?
    
    
11. Do you have any tips for something to "treat myself" instead of afternoon cookies?
    
    
12. I am making meat loaf and mashed potatoes for dinner, you know last meal and all. MMM.
    
    
13. Do you think walking around the mall for thirty minutes counts as exercise?
    

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Thursday Thirteen #10

I am addicted to politics. So much so that for my final project in my web design class I am building a web site all about the upcoming presidential election. For research purposes for my final project I am going to list thirteen issues that are being debated by the presidential candidates. I am wondering which of the following issues is the most important to you? Of the following issues, which one do you feel that the next president needs to be in agreement with you in order to get your vote. Pick one, if you want you can also write your thoughts on that issue, but sometimes sharing our political opinions is a bit touchy, so that is not required.

1. Iraq
2. Universal Health care
3. Social Security
4. Education
5. Crime
6. Poverty
7. Borders/Immigration
8. Overcrowded Prisons
9. Tax Cuts
10. FEMA
11. Homeland Security
12. Environment
13. Unemployment/jobs going overseas

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Thursday Thirteen # 9

Thirteen things that make me happy.

1. The sound of my kids laughing.


2. The sound of my husband laughing.


3. Hearing one of my favorite songs from childhood come on the radio unexpectedly.
   
4. Desserts with chocolate.


5. Soup on a cold day.


6. A finished project, like finally being done with decorating my new living room.


7. Sunshine. I love the feel of sun on my face.


8. Conversations with girl friends.


9. Swimming, I just love the way it feels to submerge myself completely under the cool water, holding my breath and straining to swim fast and far. The world is mutted, the sun is bright while I am cool. It is one of the best feelings.


10. Lazy days with a new book.


11. The first day of a new class. I am a returning college student currently taking an intermediate web design course CMST 386 for those of you familar with UMUC.


12. The season premiere of a favorite show, like Survivor.


13. That moment in the afternoon when Lily is down for a nap, just before Mandy comes home from school, with Jeff at work, that moment in the day that is all mine, when I play Spades at zone.com and watch General Hospital.

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Thursday Thirteen # 8

I have always enjoyed doing the Thursday Thirteen and thought I would give it another try...

1. Yesterday, I spent the entire day in my PJ's watching all the two year anniversary of Katrina stuff on TV. I don't know that I have anything to add except to say that I found all the national coverage was very hopeless and all the local coverage was very hopeful. People who came down here to report what is going on two years later showed all the bad glossing over all the good. People covering the story from local stations emphasized all the good and glossed over all the bad.



2. I also noticed that getting money from insurance companies and FEMA seems to be pretty biased toward people who are middle class and above.



3. There but for the grace of God go I. I can't imagine having to live in a FEMA trailer, having to continue to pay my house payment and insurance payment, while not getting any money for two years. I can't imagine my baby having to use a port-a-pot toilet at elementary school in the hot Mississippi sun. I wish I knew what to do.



4. This thing about perspective confuses me. For some families this experience was the most powerfully good experience of their lives. The thousands of people who have come to help re-build. The millions of dollars that have been donated. Neighbor helping neighbor, it is the most amazing thing.



5. For others, this has been the most horrid experience of their lives. Shaking their faith in God and people. I am sure you have seen all these stories of the people left on roof tops, the people who waded through the waters across the bridge and were turned away with shotguns, the people still living in formaldehyde filled FEMA trailers, the school children in FEMA trailers with no running water and port-a-pots-still. Everywhere you look there is growth and there is slab after slab of homes and businesses that have not been rebuilt.



6. Many people believe that you choose your perspective, that how you see this hurricane Katrina and her aftermath is a choice you make. Do you see all the good things or do you see all the bad things? I believe that at least in this case, perspective is not a choice that you make it is a choice that is made for you. I know that if I lost everything and two years later still had no hope of ever getting out of the FEMA trailer, I would not have a good perspective of humanity. But, if some strangers came and built me a new home, I think I might have a different outlook on humanity.



7. When we bought our house, we were forced to buy home owners insurance from one company, windstorm insurance from another company, and flood insurance from a third company. The windstorm insurance people finally sent us our receipt for our policy, the hard copy of our policy last week, six months after they cashed our check. For a lot of people, who had insurance, the flood insurance people say-it was the wind and the windstorm insurance people say it was the flood. They all expect people who lost everything to provide proof of what they owned, like photos or receipts? Right now the amount of money we pay toward insurance is more than the amount of money we pay toward our loan. If anything were to happen I wonder if all that would make a difference.



8. What are your thoughts on Katrina two years later? Is this an example of everything that is wrong with our country? Or is this an example of how when a situation is too much for the systems we have in place we all band together and reach into our hearts and find a solution? What is your perspective?



9. We have a four day weekend, starting tomorrow with no plans. I think I need to get out of the house and have some fun.



10. School starts on Tuesday, I am so excited about the class I am taking. However, my professor of my previous class has still not finished grading our stuff, so I wonder how I did there???



11. I finished reading Flirting with Forty, even though I was supposed to read Between, Georgia first and I still haven't finished The Memory Keepers Daughter or Baby Proof. I really like Flirting with Forty, I can't wait for our discussion.
    



12. So I read in the paper that Mississippi is the fattest, poorest, worst educated people in our country? What is up with that? I can't help but wonder, am I living in an area that is an exception to this because of the military community or due to being on the coast or because we happen to live in a really nice city? Is my perception off because I want to see the good or am I just living in an area that is unusually nice for Mississippi?
    



13. I need to get busy on Lily's quilt, so far I have bought the material, washed and ironed the material. My goal is to do the cutting and get something sewn this weekend. What about you, any weekend plans?

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Thursday Thirteen # 7

1. My Lily has trouble digesting egg, corn, and wheat. She has been out of sorts for days and spent the night throwing up. Which leads me to believe that I inadvertently fed her something which I shouldn't have. However, I cannot for the life of me figure out what it was that is making her sick. Very frustrated, and very tired.
   
   
2. I made my dad a website as a project for one of my classes several months ago. Now it is an official website. Spike's Pickleball Paddles. I have to update the content a bit. I originally made the website according to the teacher's instructions -without using any web authoring programs (typing out the HTML by hand). Now I can use web authoring tools. But, the truth is they all confuse me. I am leaving the logo on my blog with a link to his website. Feel free to put it up on your website if you feel like giving my dad some free advertisement. Or going over to his new website to buy yourself some pickleball paddles.
   
   
3. I start my next class May 29. This one is introduction to Oracle and SQL, which is data base coding. I am very excited. I already got the book, can't wait to start reading it.
   
   
4. I joined the paperback book swap, the link is on the sidebar. It is a free service, you join by posting 9 books you are willing to mail to anyone in the club who requests the book. For the first 9 books posted you receive 3 credits. Each credit allows you to order a book posted on the website from another member. There are currently over a million books posted. They are all organized and categorized and it is easy to find something you like. Every time you send a book to another member you get another credit. I am loving it. I usually donate my old paperbacks to thrift stores or friends. I read many books that I have no intention of reading again and they accumulate all over the place. Now I can send them off in the mail and get another book for free. Also, they tell you how much the postage is, so I don't even go to the Post office, I just wrap up the book and stick on some stamps, put it in the mail box and put up the little flag. I am loving it, just so you know. You pay for postage when you send and don't pay anything when you receive. You can list hard cover books and audio books as well.
   
   
5. Speaking of books... I am currently reading Goodnight Nobody by Jennifer Weirner. It is a really good book. However, I miss my bookclub, bookwormsrus. Let's start reading books again, guys. Instead of making Angel do all the work, why don't we each take turns hosting the book club. I can start, this month I will host the bookclub on my blog and then someone else can volunteer for next month. Or we can do it every other month or every three months. Anyone interested?
   
   
6. My lemon tree out back has a ton of little green balls on every branch. I couldn't be more excited. The Gardenia bush is also blossoming and the Magnolia trees all over Mississippi are beginning to bloom.
   
   
7. Does anyone know how to quilt? I took a quilting class about a year ago. It was so much fun. Now my grandma who is an expert quilter is sending me some squares she made and I am going to be putting them together to make an actual quilt. I am both scared and excited. The only time I have ever sewed anything was at the class, not even sure how to thread my machine. But, I am hoping to get some quilting books, bite the bullet and learn to sew. Maybe I should take another class?
   
   
8. Now that we are all done moving. Now that my parents have come to visit and gone home. Now I have no exciting adventures on the horizon. We don't have any summer trips planned. No exciting vacations to exotic locations. I have dreams of someday going to far away places. But, for the foreseeable future my plans are ... I have no plans. I am having a very hard time with this fact. I am missing the lure of the next adventure.
   
   
9. Do you have your Harry Potter plan in place yet? Our closest bookstore is not sure if they are going to do the midnight sale. Mandy and I are planning to find a midnight sale somewhere and we also ordered one from Amazon just to be safe. So if all goes well she will start the book at midnight and I will be able to read the one from Amazon instead of having to wait for Mandy to be done. Last book, she read it straight through in one day. Took me a week. I had Mandy read Misery in case Harry dies so we could have a plan as to how to resurrect him. I am not sure Mandy is over Dumbledore yet. If Harry goes, we shall never recover.
   
   
10. Most days Lily and I get up around 6 or 7. We like to take it easy and piddle around the house until 10 or 11 and then get out of the house and do our thing. I would really like to change this schedule so that we get out of the house at 7 or 8. The conditions outdoors here in Mississippi as we edge closer to summer are not as favorable in the afternoon as they are in the morning. Change is hard though and I am finding it extremely difficult to get out of the house before 10.
    
    
11. I would really like to incorporate some exercise into my schedule as well. Change is hard.
    
    
12. I have been working very hard to make a Lily friendly cookie, see # 1. My gluten-free blogging buddies, Laura (recipe blog here) and Natalie have inspired me to keep on trying. I have been tweaking and baking several batches of cookies per week. I am getting closer with every batch. The last couple batches have been so good that Lily will no longer eat the store bought gluten-free cookies, my parents and Jeff both said they were good, and the last batch even got the thumbs up from Mandy. This is big because Mandy doesn't pull punches and she, my parents and Jeff are not on gluten-free diets so their feedback comes from a different place than Lily. I still have a couple of kinks to work out and then I will post the recipe. It is a cocoa and peanut butter cookie with sour cream subbed for the eggs. There is too much butter in it though and I would like to get it to be a little less of a heart attack cookie and a little more like a snack than a treat if you know what I mean.
    
    
13. I found an Asian market in my area. Instead of having to drive two cities over into a bad area of town I can go just down the street to a lovely clean well lit store. I bought a box of instant Dashi (Japanese fish broth) and have been making all kinds of delicious foods. I used it to make miso soup by sifting a couple of tbs of miso paste into the broth and then adding veggies, meat, and noodles. I used the dashi in place of chicken broth in some of my stir fry recipes, so good. The dashi tastes to me like that broth you get at a Japanese restaurant with the green onions and crunchy stuff. The instant stuff is as easy to make as boiling water and tastes perfect to me.
    
    
    
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Thursday Thirteen # 6: Ice Cream

This TT brought to you buy the eldest child Amanda, her 13 favorite ice cream flavors.

1. Mint Chocolate Chip
2. Rocky Road
3. Chocolate Chocolate Chip
4. Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough
5. Fish Food, by Ben & Jerry
6. Chocolate Chip
7. Cookies and Cream
8. Kiwi Gelato
9. Strawberry Gelato
10. Chocolate
11. Vanilla
12. Tartufo Negro
13. Neopolitan

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Thursday Thirteen #5: Question

I thought I would ask a bunch of questions, things that I am always curious about, don't feel you have to answer. But, if you like to answer questions: answer 1 or answer them all.

1. What is your favorite color?
   
   
2. What is your favorite book?
   
   
3. Do you believe in God?
   
   
4. Do you go to church?
   
   
5. Why? or Why not?
   
   
6. How many close friends do you have right now?
   
   
7. When a friend does something that really hurts your feelings, what do you do? Tell them? Quit the friendship? Let it go so as not to hurt the friendship?
   
   
8. Which is more important: teaching children self reliance or teaching children they are loved unconditionally?
   
   
9. Are you afraid?
   
   
10. Is the elimination of poverty in the US or the world important to you?
    
    
11. Do you think it is possible?
    
    
12. Do you think it will be achieved or at least reduced via: teaching people self reliance or helping those who cannot help themselves?
    
    
13. When you know for sure you are right, do you feel it is important to make other people understand what it is you understand for their own good?

I'll put my answers in the comments if you are interested. Happy Thursday Everyone!
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Thursday Thirteen #4: Travel Tips

I have often been told by friends and family that they would love to travel as much as we do, but it is so hard and they therefore do not.  Traveling isn’t really easy for me either, but I have learned a few lessons that make it a bit easier.  Here is a list of things I have learned the hard way. 

 

1. I used to bring a liter of water for each member of the family on every trip, carry it along with us and guzzle it down.  I was very worried about becoming dehydrated.  I used to have to pee every 15 minutes and spend the entire trip painfully holding it or pursuing all the creepy bathrooms around the world.  Now I hydrate a couple of days before the trip and for a couple of days after the trip, only drinking moderately while traveling.  I never carry water anymore and I rarely pee in strange places.
2. I used to bring snacks on trips.  Granola bars, nuts, trail mix, dried fruit would all be put in my bag with the 4 liters of water.  Heavy bag!  I always used to have a tummy ache while traveling.  I never could figure out why my belly always hurt on trips but never at any other time?  It was all the snacks, they are all gas producing snacks, which don’t mix well with hours of sitting on planes, trains and automobiles.  Snacks are no longer brought on trips.
3. I used to splurge on trips.  I would think to myself, that I am on vacation I should treat myself.  I would eat and drink with gusto, and feel icky.  Now I eat well at home, treat myself at home or near home.  On trips I eat sparingly.  I think of trips as fun time and eat to feel good physically.  While traveling I don’t really burn any calories and everything that I put in my mouth just sits in my belly and hurts, so I only eat two or three bites and I feel much better.  Surprising but true.  Even at hotels I only eat a little bit of plain boring normal food and I don’t get run down or belly aches.
4. I used to wear sweats or jeans on trips, dress comfortably.  Now I dress up, I am conscious of wearing something comfortable but I make sure it looks professional.  The quality of how people treat you on a trip is very influential on the quality of your experience.  People treat you better when you look professional.  I always wear a button down shirt, loafers and slacks.  I fix my hair and even wear makeup.  It really does make a huge difference in the quality of interaction with all the people, both other travelers and professionals.
5. I used to keep to myself.  I used to quietly stare off into space and not interact with anyone in the crowded airports and train stations.  Now I make eye contact and small talk with everyone.  It not only influences how they treat me, but it makes me feel better to have acquaintances.  It may be all in my head but smiling and saying hello to the people in line or the lady behind the counter really makes a huge difference in the quality of my trip.
6. I used to bring way too much crap.  This is a hard one especially with kids, you don’t want to be caught somewhere and need something and not have it.  But, really carrying a ton of crap you don’t need is worse.  I have really scaled down in what I bring.  One toothbrush, one extra pair of underwear and that is it.  Just kidding, but wouldn’t that be great?  If you really need it you can buy it, but really you don’t need it!
7. I used to bring a bag just for Lily, full of snacks and toys, and books, and her favorite blanket, her favorite stuffed animal, etc.  This never worked.  She would throw each item on the floor and scream louder and louder.  All the crap just got in the way and never helped her to feel better in the least.  So now I bring one coloring book and a couple of crayons.  
8. I practice traveling type circumstances for a couple of months before the trip.  I take her out to lunch, force her to take naps in her car seat while I drive around.  I take her to crowded food court type places and have picnics.  I make her take a nap in the bed with me, all kinds of things that we can introduce at home a little at a time to make the trip a little less difficult for her.
9. I make sure to let Lily run a lot when we have the chance.  We have one person stand in line while the other person chases Lily around the line or nearby.  We let her fun up and down the long crowded terminals.  We skip and hop and dance and basically act like idiots, but she does so much better when she is physically exhausted.  I cannot tell you how many laps I have run around airport terminals, but we take turns on Lily duty and it seems to work.
10. I used to want to sit at the front of the plane, to get off first.  Now I try to get tickets at the back.  With a little one the back is awesome.  There is usually a little bit of standing room in the back of the plane, for a screaming little one it is nice to have a place to stand up and rock them, a place that is out of the way.  We spent the entire flight from Japan to America and then back from America to Japan taking turns standing up and rocking Lily.  She just wouldn’t sit in her seat, she wouldn’t sleep, it was nice to have that place to stand.  There was a kitchen back there and the flight attendants were very nice about letting us pace around in a circle rocking Lily.
11. I used to just show up places and see what was there and see what I felt like doing at the time.  I discovered that doing research makes a world of difference.  Instead of buying a map when I get there, I buy the map ahead of time.  I pour over the map and memorize the how to get where I want to go.  Weather it is walking, or driving I know the way before I get there.  I know the land marks, I have the path highlighted on the map and the map in my bag.  So much stress, so many arguments have occurred because we were trying to figure out where we were going while driving down the road or while wandering around the streets.  We even would show up in a city in Italy, buy the map when we got off the train and spend the day not knowing where we were or what we were looking at.  Now I know what I am doing, where I am going and what I am looking at.  The rest of the family they don’t care but having one person lead the way makes it smooth, so do the prep work it really pays off.
12. I used to carry a backpack and not a purse.  Now I carry a small purse so that the essentials are easy to access.  Like tickets, a pen, id, money, toothbrush, the map, phone numbers.  It is very important to have easy access to these items, throwing them in the backpack and digging around for everything all the time is a recipe for disaster.  Leave the backpack at home anyways, less is more.
13. I used to have a lot of trouble sleeping on trips.  I would never be able to sleep away from home and this contributed to my feeling crappy while traveling.  Now I incorporate physical exercise everyday.  We make sure there is a gym at our hotel or nearby.  Or we will make sure we briskly walk at least three miles, everyday.  I think one of the reasons I had so much trouble sleeping is that I would spend the majority of the time sitting and exercise helps.   

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Thursday Thirteen #3

1. Lily does not have strep-throat. By Wednesday she was starting to feel a little restless being indoors. Jeff got the afternoon off and we decided to take Lily to get a new puzzle.



2. We went to my very favorite store in all of Japan, a lovely children's store filled with lovely Japanese children's clothes, toys, and everything one could imagine. Luckily Jeff was there to pull me away from all the beautiful things and quickly pick the first puzzle we came upon. I love the Japanese puzzles, we get the 60 piece puzzles and they are very sturdy card board instead of the easy to bend and break American puzzles which only come in 24 pieces or 500 pieces with nothing in between.



3. We then stopped at the Japanese Grocery Store:
   
   



4. Mandy was expecting to have to take the bus home after volleyball practices because Jeff has been working so much and not sharing the car. His having the afternoon off meant we could swing by the school and pick her up. By the time we arrived Lily was having fits. I went inside the gym to make sure that Mandy was actually still there and to see how much longer. They were playing a practice game and the score was 3 to 7. Games usually take at least a half an hour.



5. I suggested to Jeff that we take Lily home and come back to get Mandy. I didn't know how to convey this message to Mandy as she was in the middle of a game, so we just left. I figured that the game she was in wouldn't even be over until after I got back. So we took screaming Lily home and I went back to the gym. This took 20 minutes.



6. When I got back I couldn't find Mandy. I waited for awhile. I asked some girls to check the locker room. I asked all her friends. Finally someone told me that she took the bus.



7. I hadn't seen her at the bus stop in front of the school when I arrived, so I checked the library to see if she was waiting there, I called home to see if she had made it home, I went back to the gym and asked around some more. After about an hour, I went home. She was obviously not at the gym, she must be on her way home. I just don't know how I could have missed her.



8. The bus comes every 30 minutes and as it becomes apparent that she isn't on yet another bus, I become more and more worried. She finally comes home, two hours later.



9. I rush to the door and ask where she has been. She bursts into tears. The bus she got on, which is a later bus than the one she normally gets on because practice was running late. This bus stops running at 7 PM. So this bus took Mandy to the bus depot and kicked her off. There is a second bus that runs the same route which runs until 10 or 11PM, but the one she got on apparently stops running at 7PM. They didn't tell her when she got on or when they passed the last stop she could get off, they just took her to the bus depot and then kicked her off the bus.



10. She was in shorts and a t-shirt, soaked in sweat from practice. She was carrying two bags full of books and clothes. It was below 50 degrees and misty. It was dark. She was two miles from home. There wasn't a phone or an open business along the way. No one stopped to offer to help her along the way. She walked home. She was upset.



11. I used to walk home from school much farther everyday, rain or shine. I can remember being soaked to my underwear. I can remember how lonely it is to walk and walk all alone, realizing that no one cares enough to wonder if you need a ride.



12. I gave her lots and lots of hugs, I cried. She got over it in about three seconds. I wonder if I ever will.



13. Lily's puzzle, the stupid puzzle that caused all this crap, ended up being all light blue and white, every piece looked exactly the same. Jeff couldn't even figure the dumb thing out. Lily spent all day Thursday engrossed in this puzzle, she spent hours working on it again and again. Sometimes she would let me help but mostly she just worked and worked. This morning she put it together four or five times and then put it away on the shelf, I guess she has conquered the puzzle and is finally ready to move on, evil puzzle.

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Thursday Thirteen # 2

1. October 4th was the 75th anniversary of the first airplane to fly non-stop across the Pacific Ocean. The flight started here in Misawa, Japan and ended in Wenatchee, Washington, USA. Miss Veedol, the plane, is the symbol of the city of Misawa. The flight took more than 40 hours, glad the flight time has decreased a bit. This region is famous for apples, some say the apple seeds came as a gift from the pilots of the Miss Veedol.


2. For about five minutes, I was so excited to know of the two assignments available. Then I realized I still don't know where I am going. We are getting closer.



3. Lily has discovered a love of painting. She will paint for hours, this is how I am able to watch TV. I sit with her and I pretend to paint, while she paints one page after another. Everyday on our walk we check out the changing colors on the trees, later when we paint, Lily paints the trees the color of the day. The color she chooses to paint her trees is never the actual color of the trees. Yesterday's trees had pink trunks and green leaves.



4. Mandy kicked ass at volleyball last weekend, she is awesome. I can't wait to go see the games again this weekend.



5. I have been watching Weeds, it is the best show I have ever seen, very inappropriate, but extremely funny.



6. Jeff put Mississippi as his first choice and LA as second choice, we will find out by November 15th, where we will be living come March.



7. I love my computer classes, I can't decide if I want to become a Web Page developer or a Computer Forensics expert. I guess that is why you go to college to learn, the more I learn the more I love. Someday I will learn how to put my Java programs on my blog, and then you can play paper, scissors, and stone.



8. I still love Blogger Beta, so lovely. I can't get the spell checker to work, and I have to sign in every time I post a comment on anyone's blog or come to my blog, because the system doesn't seem capable of remembering me, so far that is my only complaint.



9. This week is week four of going to the gym for me, Lily and I walk up there every morning with some friends, they have a playroom it is lovely. Instead of losing weight, I have been steadily gaining weight since re-incorporating the gym back in my life. It isn't muscle, it is ice cream. Time to re-start the eating portion of the plan, yuck!



10. I have a yellow ticket in my mailbox. This means I have a package, I will pick it up today, I think it is my book, Swapping Lives by Jane Green. The book I am supposed to be reading for my book club. I think you should join our book club, there is still time.



11. My friend Angel is selling PartyLite, if you are looking for an easy gift or something nice for yourself, check out her blog. Angel is a real life friend who I have known for years and I can vouch for. You can set up a paypal account and order through her. She gives gifts and discounts too.



12. I am making my favorite for dinner tonight: rosemary, garlic, lemony roasted chicken with red potatoes. I will someday have to post a recipe. I was thinking about trying to post some gluten-free recipes but I never remember to measure. Who would want to read a recipe that goes, a little of this, a lot of that, stir and bake for a while, you know until it is done. I guess I cook through intuition more than through actual science. You would think this means my food is good, not so much, but the chicken it is divine. Even better than the roasted chicken, I did before we went gluten-free. (We try to eat as a family all at the table and therefore I try to cook stuff that we can all eat, even though only Lily is technically gluten-free).



13. I cannot believe that no one clicked on the link and read the Baby Elephant Story, it is the best thing I have ever written. I guess I will have to sit down and try to write something good that is new. Until then you could always read about the cute little baby elephant whose parents try to save him from drowning in the pool. Will the baby survive?

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Thursday Thirteen # 1

1. We are planning on going to the Morioka Zoo this Monday with some friends. We haven't had the chance to go on any trips with our friends in over a year. This may be our last time before we leave. I have never been to the Zoo, it is a couple of hours away. It should be fun. Turns out that Monday is Columbus day and a Japanese holiday all at the same time so we are all off, which never happens.


2. Mandy's school is having homecomming week. She asked me to help her with her hair on Wacky Tacky day. The only time she has asked me to help with her hair since she was about five.


3. Mandy has a volleyball game tonight, she has been working hard this season and is a part time setter. The covetted position on the team.


4. I just signed up for the scholarship for two more courses, my last two courses here in Misawa. The new classes start Oct. 30, the ones I am taking now end Dec. 4. That means the month of Novemeber I will not remember. Hopefully my new classes are easy. The ones I am taking now are ok. I am currently trying to figure out what a Java Array is?
   
5. Lily and I are having a hard time getting along. I think I broke her. I feel like every decision I make is wrong, wrong, wrong. I tried to potty train her again and she refused. I presured her and now she just refuses to pee at all ever. My choices are a girl who wears regular underwear and never pees or a girl who wears pull ups and never sits on the potty. At least she gives me choices.


6. Mandy and I went out to dinner last weekend, just the two of us. We discovered that we miss each other. We used to be so close. Lately (the last 6 years) not so much. We both miss our relationship, but this entire week, we both tried but it is so hard. So hard to be close to each other. I think the problem is that we are both wanting to be the alpha female and it isn't working. So more trying.


7. Did you know that in some people allergies cause a the bodies chemical makeup to change and in some people this causes one to have anxiety and depression? I found this out the hard way, I still haven't called the doctor to get my allergy prescription updated. Now it isn't just allergies it is allergies plus crazy. Joy.


8. Jeff and I went on a date last weekend. We saw Miami Vice the movie. It was horrid. The worst movie I have ever seen. Jeff said it was just like the TV show. But, I loved the TV show. Either my tastes have changed or the movie was nothing like the show. I bought the first season of Miami Vice the TV show for Jeff about a year ago. Someday I am going to sit down and watch it to see if my tastes have changed or not. I really hated that movie.


9. Jeff has been doing two jobs for the last several weeks. Not like twice the work load in the normal hours, but 16 hour days. It is driving me nuts. This makes me feel bad. That he is so supportive all the time and when he can't be supportive I lose it. On the other hand, I can only handle what I can handle.


10. I am seriously considering getting a job at our next base. I am just not sure that I am cut out for the stay at home mommy bit. Logically it is the best for Lily and her stupid food allergies. Also she is not on course with other kids her age. She is always about six months behind what she should be developmentally. Having one on one with me helps her get to the next step with love and kindness instead of being labeled a problem child. I am afraid that in a stressful situation Lily would be a frustration to a care provider and not be liked. Maybe I am projecting my frustration. I see the local care providers and they are not the type of people I would feel comfortable caring for Lily. Still it would be nice to get a break sometimes.


11. We should be finding out what assignments are available in the next few days. The list is supposed to come out on Monday but that is Columbus Day. I am not sure if that means the list will come out Friday or Tuesday. Since we are a day ahead here in Japan, it will most likely be Wednesday before we see the list. Still that is less than a week. A list of the possibilities.


12. There is a Defense Attache position available in Norway. Jeff has previously applied for two or three of these positions and been denied. We are getting excited about going to the States, but I believe he is going to apply for this Norway position anyways, just to see. We wont get our hopes up or anything, but no sense not trying.


13. My blogging friend Jennifer writes a Thursday Thirteen every week. Today is Friday, but still Thursday in the States, anyways I am a copy cat. Great idea and I haven't been blogging in awhile I thought a good list would help.