Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. I like the way the neighborhood comes out together, it is a night of neighborly love. I have high hopes for meeting neighbors and having a lot of fun. I am busy working on getting Lily worn out enough to take a nap today. She really doesn't do naps well anymore, but then she has grouchy evenings. Hopefully a very busy active day will wear her down enough to take an afternoon nap and then be extra perky for a night of fun.
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Sunday, October 28, 2007
New Pants
The weather here has been on the chilly side this past week. We have had to unpack our long pants. Turns out that Lily grew quite a bit in the 7 months we have been here. Like about a foot. Her pants are up to her knees. I hadn't noticed. Wish we could wear shorts all year long, save money.
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10/28/2007 12:01:00 PM
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Saturday, October 27, 2007
hair
PS, Angel- I have to blow dry my hair too. Or it looks horrid, see slide show of fall muster below. Not so much to straighten but to add a bit of volumn.
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10/27/2007 01:50:00 PM
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The Why Girl
Here are some recent shots of the girl who asks, why? Why can't I play in the street? Why can't we take the dog to the store? Why is it Saturday? Why, why, why - all day long. And one of my new haircut. Have a good weekend.
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10/27/2007 08:50:00 AM
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Friday, October 26, 2007
Fall Muster
However, we were soon to discover that the battle did not occur from 9-5. In fact there was nothing going on at 9AM. No food being sold, no battles being fought...
It turns out that during the Fall Muster, a bunch of people (more than 100) get together. They dress in Civil War period costumes. Men, women, and children; they all spend the weekend out at the re-enactment site. They spend the night, they re-enact a weekend in the life of the soliders who fought in the civil war. It is not just the battles. They slept under white canvas tents, they were cooking breakfast over an open fire. All of them slept out in the fields, in the camp that was designed to be as close as possible to a camp during the civil war.
At 9AM when we arrived they were just getting up and rustling up some breakfast. Soon there was a morning church service, then a commander's call, then some practise exercises and later, at around 2PM the battle would occur. We had a bit of fun wandering around the campsites. Everyone pretty much ignored us. We were the only people there, not participating in the Muster. We saw a couple of people talking on cell phones.
We wandered over to the battle field and took a close up look at the cannons. Lily had a blast running in the open field. All that open space and she was in heaven. They told us other folks don't normally show up until noon. I guess this is a lesson learned, in Mississippi, even if an event starts at 9AM never show up until noon. OK, now I understand.
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10/26/2007 08:34:00 AM
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Thursday, October 25, 2007
Thursday Thirteen # 11
I have been trying to lose weight for 20 years, every year I seem to gain about 5 lbs over the course of the year instead of losing. Except this last year, I remained the same, and the year before I lost 15 lbs. I have tried many different diets (only free ones). Read many diet books (from the library). I feel like I should be a weight loss expert by now, except for the fact that I still need to lose weight. Here are some of the things I have learned...
- If I remove treats from my day to day life, I need to replace them with some other type of reward or I feel punished. Books, magazines, shopping, calling a friend, I have tried a lot of things, but it is hard to find something to replace afternoon cookies.
- If I give up sugar, flour, potato, and white rice for two weeks - I no longer have any hunger pains or cravings, ever. But those two weeks - require a padded room.
- I hate breakfast, gagging it down sucks, all the skinny people I know in my real life do not eat breakfast.
- I have to exercise every single day at the exact same time or I get off track and skip it.
- If I go to the diabetic section of the store and buy a lot of sugar-free crap, it helps me get through those first two weeks of giving up sugar.
- I think I am resistant to change. I find it really hard to give up sugar and white stuff and start exercising all at once.
- I do a two week: before the diet actually starts period, where I get off the sugar and white stuff and I start to exercise. Except since I am not technically dieting yet, I eat sugar-free pies and brownies and I don't exercise-exercise I do low impact low effort-just get in the habit type exercise. It gets me in the mood.
- Do you skinny people really eat breakfast?
- Can you tell I am about to go on a diet? How fun is that?
- Do you have any recommendations?
- Do you have any tips for something to "treat myself" instead of afternoon cookies?
- I am making meat loaf and mashed potatoes for dinner, you know last meal and all. MMM.
- Do you think walking around the mall for thirty minutes counts as exercise?
The Thursday Thirteen website
Technorati Thursday Thirteen tag.
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10/25/2007 09:21:00 AM
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Wednesday, October 24, 2007
One Sweet Treat to Read

Lynn from A Tired Mama has given me this awesome award. It is so cute. I can't wait to pass it on. This award was created by the obviously creative and talented Trista from the blog The Pumpkin Patch, she wants all of us to pass this award on to our favorite readers. All of my readers hold a special place in my heart, I have decided to pass this award on to the following people because of how much they have given to me and in hopes of brightening their day.
Mrs. Grumpy: AKA Laura is my newest blogging buddy. Laura's writing is phenomenal and everyday she helps me to realize what is important in my life and where my focus should be. Laura recently and unexpectedly lost her beloved husband Leonard and she is sharing herself so completely as she bravely faces one challenge after another. Laura is simply the kindest and bravest person there is. She doesn't quite know that about herself but all her readers, we know it. For Laura, when you next see your husband, remember how much you love him. Today won't be the last day you see him, but if it were, you wouldn't be too tired or busy, you wouldn't have something else on your mind. Today, look in his eyes and make sure he realizes how much you love that he is your husband. And go read, I Promise Not to Laugh During the Seance.
Next up is Lorelei: who has two blogs and I never know which one to read or to link, today it is: MVP Support. Lorelei and I have so much in common, we are both students at UMUC, although she recently finished her degree and joined the working world. I was amazed by how fast she got a great job, then wham they laid her off. How awful is that, first you have your dream job and then it is gone. Lorelei is a gifted writer and a sweetheart. I appreciate that she stops by and leaves me comments everyday rain or shine.
And then there was Angel. Angel is going to be mad at me for not putting her first on the list. Angel likes to give me a hard time because she is actually a real life friend. I love Angel for a million reasons but the thing that stands out in my mind is that Angel is the type of person who doesn't settle for second best. She wants her life to be the best it can possibly be and she will not be happy until ... We recently read the book Flirting with Forty and had a discussion about women and happiness. Angel was the only one who said, that she is NOT happy. I love her honesty with herself and with us.
Kim has taught me a great deal about how to get the most out of life. Because I was really poor and really resentful of how hard I worked as a single mom and how wasteful all my married, earning more, working less, co-workers were with their money, I became hateful toward people who spend money on materialistic things. We all have friends and family members who take the spending thing too far, but I project that toward anyone who has anything. Starving kids and all. Kim is the kindest person, and she has taught me that it is ok, to take care of yourself and your home. You can within reason make your home a lovely beautiful place that makes you proud and happy without being an evil person. The people in our lives can help us grow and learn another perspective and knowing Kim has taught me that spending money is not evil. Except if you have kids, a new car and no health insurance-then you are wrong.
I hope that those of you reading this will take the time to go stop by and say hi to my friends up above and feel free to take this adorable award and pass it on to some of your readers. I am trying to spread the love with these awards, I have another one to give out tomorrow. Except all this linking and such takes freaking forever.
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10/24/2007 09:27:00 AM
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Saturday, October 20, 2007
sticky fingers
Lily and I have just been so busy lately. Nothing really exciting to say about it all. We go here and there, we have fun everywhere. She has been spectacularly well behaved lately. Except when she is over tired or hungry. Other than the WHY phase we are going through, she is going through the make-believe phase. The make-believe phase is my favorite! We play school, house, have tea parties, take trips to the moon, it is so much more fun than doing puzzles and building things with blocks.
In order to keep peace and harmony in our home, Lily and I play together everyday for a couple of hours in the morning. She usually picks what we do, except that I buy a lot of educational crap and try to convince her that doing those things would be so much fun. Like, workbooks, I call them game books and we go through our game books learning our numbers and letters. That is what I mean when I say Lily is obsessed with something, I mean that everyday for ages she will choose to do the same exact thing during our play time. For a year it was puzzles. Before that it was blocks. For a couple of months it was counting. Then it was the workbooks. Now it is make believe. Sometimes I can convince her to do a workbook, but mostly it is tea parties and school. I am the student. Along with all the babies. I just wanted to clear that up.
After our morning play time, Lily and I go out and about. For awhile I was not doing that so much because of the heat. And because it turns out I was anemic. Now I am taking iron, I feel great and we are back to our schedule and amazingly Lily's behavior has improved. Who would have thunk it. Yesterday we went to the Lynn Meadows Discovery Center, a local children's museum. Only this place is set up precisely for Miss Lily. It has a huge yard, with tree houses and play houses and a train. And then inside. It is an enormous two story building filled with rooms of make believe. There is a pretend grocery store, with isles, and shelves filled with food, with a cash register, etc. Then there is the pretend hotel, where you can put on a hat and gloves, and jewelry and sit down to a fancy tea. There are also cakes and cookies. There are dozens of rooms filled with all kinds of fun make believe. We have so much fun there. Except yesterday. We were the only ones there. She ran me ragged for two hours, my muscles are screaming today. Up and down the stairs, sit down, stand up, go, go, go. I think they should sell it as the mommy boot camp. I had never seen such a happy little girl.
On the way home we went through the McDonald's drive thru and I got Lily her first ice cream cone, which she ate in the backseat of the car. She did really well. We were giggling as I drove home and she dripped ice cream down her hands. I don't imagine this was a terribly interesting story, but it is all I have for now. I am busy writing code and having tea parties. Lily's new room is a good size, I am thinking of making her a little tea party corner.
Oh and this weekend we are going to the fall muster. Which is a civil war reenactment. My first, I am very excited. The Yankees are coming, the Yankees are coming!!!!
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10/20/2007 08:43:00 AM
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Thursday, October 18, 2007
Why I'll Never Be a RockStar
We were having a terribly busy but fun day. I had been running around since 7AM. Right after putting the chicken in the oven I remember a few things I really needed at the store, I left Mandy in charge of the oven and Lily and I buzzed up to the store for a quick pick up. Just as I pulled into the parking lot a really great song came on the radio. As I turned off the car, in the middle of the song, I had an overwhelming desire to finish the song. I hummed it softly under my breath. But, the diva in me took over and I began to really belt out a couple of lines. I put my all into the song, I sang with feeling, with flavor. I really love to sing. I was really having a good day. Very busy, but things were going well, I was getting things done, no snags. The song just errupted out of me like a volcano.
Lily: Mom, what are you doing?
Me: Singing.
Lily: Can you stop it, please.
The thing is that I love to sing. I sing along with the radio. I sing that song in my head. I sing loudly, I sing it with feeling. But, I sing very badly. My whole life I have been singing badly, but having kids, who are always asking me to stop, has taught me that I really do sing quite badly. I have two cute little Simon Cowells living with me. Isn't that lovely? I guess it is better than trying out for American Idol only to be humiliated in front of the entire country. According to my kids I would be featured in the worst portion.
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10/18/2007 07:46:00 AM
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What Kind of Reader Are You?
I got this one from Katya:
| What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Literate Good Citizen You read to inform or entertain yourself, but you're not nerdy about it. You've read most major classics (in school) and you have a favorite genre or two. | |
| Dedicated Reader | |
| Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm | |
| Book Snob | |
| Fad Reader | |
| Non-Reader | |
| What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz | |
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10/18/2007 05:44:00 AM
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Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Get Over It
This morning Mandy sent me a text message from school. It seems that she forgot to bring the receipt showing she had paid to take the PSAT test and they would not allow her to take the test without the receipt. I called her to ask if I could bring her the receipt or if it was too late. It was too late. She was beside herself, ready to cry. I actually cried, but I waited until we were done talking. She had paid for this test with her own money, money that she had worked very hard to earn. She is also not such a hot test taker and she has been working very hard at practicing for this test, and she really understands how important taking this test is in regard to her college future. She was just devastated.
At that moment I didn't really think it was necessary for me to get mad at her or tell her all the things she already knew. I thought it was important to tell her: there is nothing more she can do about it, she needs to let it go, she needs to get over it. We will figure out something to do about the test. Buy a book, find something online, maybe there will be another opportunity to take the PSAT. We will find a solution it is not the end of the world. We all make mistakes. I hope I was able to help her to start feeling better, she was pretty upset.
Later I got to thinking about it. I was thinking that this was probably a really good life lesson. I know that is mean and insensitive to her feelings. In a way, I was thinking that all those tests in school are really not all that efficient at preparing us for the rest of our lives. I am a really good test taker, but that doesn't really help me get a job or be successful. Didn't really help me get a job, earn money, or be happy.
I have been noticing lately, that a lot of the people who are my age, my friends and Jeff's co-workers have achieved success in their lives by this point. Jeff for instance is very successful. I have noticed that the people who seem have a lot of career success don't seem to be the same people who did really well in school and did really well on those tests. Seems that they have other skills either instead of in addition to the ability to pick the right answer in a multiple choice environment. Like the ability to fail. Have you ever noticed that some people when they mess up they just crawl under the covers and hide from the world unable to face the world for having made a mistake. And other people, just get over it. I think that the ability to get over it is a real key to success and to happiness. One of the things I really am hoping and working toward preparing my girls for in their lives.
UPDATE: Mandy called me later to tell me that she had taken the test after all. It seems that when she called to tell me that she was not able to take the test, this meant that she had noticed that she had forgotten the receipt and she had concluded they would not allow her to take the test. So, she went to her first period class instead of reporting to the testing area.
The testing people noticed she had paid for the test and was not present so they paged her over the intercom to come to the testing area and take the test. Then, they waited for her to get her butt to the testing area before they started the test.
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10/17/2007 09:17:00 AM
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Tuesday, October 16, 2007
An Award for the Spirit of Christmasz
The dear and sweet Lynn from A Tired Mama has given me An Award For The Spirit of Christmas and I am passing this award on to: Shelia, Marion, Luckzmom, Katya, and Natalie. Who have all been very kind to me.
To pick up your award go to Santa's Community Blog: The Spirit of Christmas Award
The award is given to bloggers who have the spirit of Christmas, that is to say that they show kindness toward others. If you know of a blogger who has this type of spirit, why not stop on by Santa's blog and pick up this award and pass it on to one of your blogging buddies.
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10/16/2007 10:43:00 AM
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Monday, October 15, 2007
Are Your Buns Warm and Buttery?
The first time I met Jeff's family was shortly after we were married. Jeff has two sisters and a brother, they are all married with kids and this makes for a big family. A big loud family. When we got into town we immediately hooked up with Jeff's older sister and her husband at a restaurant for lunch. It was one of those steak restaurants with a salad bar and the all you can eat, 'hot and buttery buns' on the table. Jeff was so happy, 'hot and buttery buns' are his thing.
Later, we met up with Jeff's older brother, his older brother's family, and his younger sister, and her family; at another restaurant for dinner. This restaurant was a buffet that came with an unlimited supply of 'hot and buttery buns' brought to your table. Jeff was so happy. We all had a lovely evening.
Let me back up here for a minute. Jeff was stationed in Italy, he had not been home or seen his family in a couple of years. So they were not only meeting me, his new wife, and Mandy his new daughter, but they were getting the chance to see Jeff. It was also Christmas week, so his whole family was in the same town and we were getting together for various meals and activities.
The next day, we went to visit Jeff's Momma for lunch and then the entire family was supposed to get together for dinner. Jeff's older sister picked the restaurant. She didn't ask anyone's opinion, she just called and told us when and where to be. When we showed up, Jeff's sibling rivalry was showing a bit. He kept complaining that this restaurant did not have his 'warm and buttery buns'. He was upset that he came all this way to hook up with the family and for the most part except for meals they were too busy to spend time with us. He was upset that they never call him, he had been overseas for almost 10 years and none of his family called, wrote, emailed, or visited. Before he married me he had not spoken to his family in over a year and they didn't even notice. All that, so he was disgruntled not to have been consulted about the restaurant, and the lack of 'warm and buttery buns'. He was being a bit of a pest.
We all sat down at a very long table in the middle of this lovely restaurant. Jeff loudly exclaiming this and that about the buns. I noticed that on the menu was a side order of rolls and suggested that we try them. Jeff complained we would have to pay for those rolls. He complained that rolls are not buns. He said they probably aren't even buttery rolls. Just then the very young and obviously shy waitress made an appearance at our table. We were a very loud table. Several very loud conversations going on all at once. Jeff looks up from his menu and asks the waitress in a very loud and very accusatory voice,
Are your buns warm and buttery?Dead silence. Everyone at our table was instantly quiet. Eyes wide. The poor waitress did not know what to say and started to turn bright red. Jeff took a second or two to "get" what he had said. He then proceeded to turn bright red. He apologized, tried to explain. He ordered a drink. The rest of us started to laugh and laugh. It was hilarious. We still ask Jeff if his buns are warm and buttery, whenever we get together with his family.
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10/15/2007 08:36:00 AM
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Sunday, October 14, 2007
The Martians are Coming
I believe that Lily has conspired with Martians to such my brain out my ear. Here is an example of a typical conversation between Lily and I.
This conversation circled for about an hour. No matter how hard I tried I could not get her to stop asking me what WHY starts with and why does WHY start with W. I felt like saying WHY starts with Y, now leave me alone. Go play outside. Please stop asking me questions. But, I am afraid by then my brain had oozed out my ear and was sitting in a puddle on the floor.
- Lily:
- What does WHY start with?
- Mommy:
- The word WHY starts with the letter W. The word WHY is spelled W-H-Y. Can you spell the word WHY?
- Lily:
- W-H-Y. What does WHY start with?
- Mommy:
- WHY starts with W. There is a word WHY and a letter Y. The word WHY starts with W and ends with Y.
- Lily:
- What does WHY start with?
- Mommy:
- I already told you what WHY starts with, what does WHY start with?
- Lily:
- WHY starts with W, Why does WHY start with W?
- Mommy:
- WHY is a word which is spelled W-H-Y, therefore it starts with W. Just like the word YOU starts with Y, the word YOU is spelled Y-O-U. Can you spell the word YOU?
- Lily:
- Y-O-U, what does WHY start with
- Mommy:
- WHY starts with W.
- Lily:
- Why does WHY start with W?
....
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10/14/2007 08:57:00 AM
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Saturday, October 13, 2007
Dancing Lady
Sorry I have been away so long. I have been so busy. Mostly with school work. I am trying to figure out how to write a script to make a questionnaire, it will ask you your opinions on the upcoming election and then tell you which of the candidates most closely reflects your thinking. Sounds easy right. Well, I don't know as much about computer programming as I think I do. The biggest problem is that my teacher wants us to use a PERL script and I haven't taking a PERL programming class yet. I could write a java program to do the programming bit, but I don't know how to get java on a web page. I am a wicked good java programmer, or at least the first two semesters of java, I still have three to go. I guess the problem is I bit off more than I can chew. So now I am retracing my steps and simply doing the bare minimum that the teacher asks us to do. How boring is that? I am going to ask people which of the candidates they are planning to vote for, a simple poll. I will get my credit and life will go on.
By the way, this is the coolest thing I have ever seen. Go here and watch the dancing lady to see if you are right brained or left brained. See if you can make her switch, I was finally able to get her to go the other way, but for the longest time I could only see her moving clockwise. Tell me which way you see her turning and if you can make her switch.
http://www.news.com.au/heraldsun/story/0,21985,22556281-661,00.html
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10/13/2007 05:01:00 PM
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Monday, October 08, 2007
NaBloPoMo

Did you happen to see the little widget on the bottom of the left column of my blog? November is National Blog Posting Month. Post every day for the month of November. That's all you have to do. Last year I did not join in on the fun, but many of my favorite bloggers did, and this year I am going to give it a try as well. Last year there were more than 2000 participants and this year there are 947 people already signed up. It is a great way to meet new bloggers and have a lot of fun. Plus, there are prizes.
You can read more about it here at Fussy.org.
Or go directly to the NaBloPoMo.com to sign up.
And don't forget to add me as your friend!
How to find something interesting to say everyday for an entire month is quite a challenge. Some ideas that others have had is to attempt to write that book, just wing it, research a topic you are interested in learning more about and post your findings, photos count, video counts...
I am going to try to take this opportunity to write more about our travels, to post some of those stories that I haven't had a chance to write about as of yet. To find time to get all those photos and stories organized and posted. That was the original reason I started this blog, now I just blather on about any old thing. What about you, are you brave enough to take on this challenge?
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10/08/2007 09:36:00 AM
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Sunday, October 07, 2007
An accomplishment
I have been diagnosed with Anemia, I have had it before, but after taking the iron for a few days I am feeling my old self again. I am in good spirits and actually accomplishing things around the house.
About a month ago, or longer, Jeff and I bought some paint. We need to paint our house, should have had the previous owners do it. I was just so excited to get this house and Jeff refused to budge on price, I negotiated down the things they needed to do before we moved in. I got my house and a butt load of work.
So today I painted the post that the mailbox sits on. I scrubbed the mail box clean and I planted 20 baby spider plants around the base of the mailbox pole. Lily helped me. We ended up getting paint all over Lily. I rushed her into the house to get her washed before it dried in her hair.
She ran her paint smeared fingers through...my new curtains, the walls, her eyes, her hair, the couch. She also painted the little reflective disks on the side of the mailbox and the little red flag. I got Lily all scrubbed. Got the paint off the furniture, walls, and curtains...then our water stopped working. I went outside and found that the water had quit working for the whole neighborhood. Great. I didn't get a chance to wash off the paint brushes, but I thought Lily's hair was more important at the time. Later when the water came back on I was able to scrub the paint off the reflective disks and the red flag. When Jeff was driving to pick up Mandy, he saw along the side of the road, a boil water advisory for our neighborhood. It was a hand written sign. OK, glad we went out. Welcome to Mississippi.
Maybe someday I will attempt to put some of the paint on the actual house. I wonder what would happen then? But, I now have the best looking mailbox on the block!
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10/07/2007 04:43:00 PM
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Saturday, October 06, 2007
good to be bad
Lily's favorite thing to do these days is to learn to spell new words. She is always asking me, what does ---- start with, what does ----- start with? She knows how to spell lost of words, she also knows lots of words that start with each letter of the alphabet. It is just something fun we do to pass the time.
But, lately her favorite game to play is something she made up called, wrong letter.
She tells me, Alligator starts with Zand I laugh and say
Zebra starts with A.She laughs and says
Goat starts with Wand I respond
Watermelon starts with G.She will do this for ages. I tell myself this is a good thing because we are having fun and she is learning. I am trying to see if she will see the patterns in how I answer her or if she will pick up and add some patterns into her game. So far I do not think she sees the patterns.
My only worry is that when she goes to school she will answer all the questions intentionally wrong to be funny. Oh well, she has found a way to combine all her favorite things: telling jokes, talking about letters, and being contrary. Mostly she just likes to be bad. She gets that from her dad.
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10/06/2007 01:06:00 PM
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Friday, October 05, 2007
yucky, sad, nasty, stinky, dirty...
For as long as I can remember Lily has been a very observant little back seat driver. She keeps careful track of which streets we use to get to each destination. I can remember when she was just two, she once started crying because I had told her we were going to gymnastics and we turned down a different street, to mail a letter before going to gymnastics.
Lily is always talking about our journey, this is the road with Wal-Mart, this is the road with the water, I don't like this road, etc. A few months ago I decided to take a new route to Lowes, and Lily was furious with me, as she always is when I don't take the path that she is expecting. I thought to myself that perhaps I should teach her the names of all the streets, so that she would be better equipped to tell me off when I went the wrong way.
It took me about a week. Jeff drove her somewhere and came home utterly amazed that she told him which way to turn and the name of every street along the way. At the stop sign please turn right on Main or at the blinking red light please turn left on Front. It is hilarious. Except when I go the wrong way, she is even more upset than ever and has the vocabulary to explicitly tell me which way I should have gone. I thought that giving her the tools to communicate her thoughts more effectively would help her to not get made, no. She wants what she wants.
We do have some interesting conversations and negotiations about our routes. I still love to go off on the road less traveled and Lily still likes to take the familiar route we have traveled a thousand times before.
Yesterday when we were traveling home from a day spent out and about, we were several hours past her nap time and it had been quite some time since she had last eaten. Let us just say she was not being the nicest person. She was in fact disagreeing with everything, and no amount of coercion could deter her from her path of being a pain. I tried offering different routes home in an attempt to get home without the screaming melt down from hell. She did not want to take any of the paths I suggested. It was so funny. I would say, we can take Main Street, and she would say, Main street is stinky. I would say we can take Front street and she would say Front Street is dirty. All through all the possible streets we could take home, they were yucky, stinky, sad, nasty, dirty, groady, and rosen (I think this is her way of saying frozen which she somehow thinks is a bad descriptive word). I was pretty amazed at her vast vocabulary of descriptive words.
After we got home and had a bit of a nap. I had to wake her up to go and get Mandy from one thing or another. Lily was in a better mood and assured me that the roads in question were no longer: yucky, sad, nasty, stinky, dirty, groady, and rosen. It was also funny that she remember all the various roads and their specific descriptions.
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10/05/2007 09:15:00 AM
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Thursday, October 04, 2007
Thursday Thirteen #10
I am addicted to politics. So much so that for my final project in my web design class I am building a web site all about the upcoming presidential election. For research purposes for my final project I am going to list thirteen issues that are being debated by the presidential candidates. I am wondering which of the following issues is the most important to you? Of the following issues, which one do you feel that the next president needs to be in agreement with you in order to get your vote. Pick one, if you want you can also write your thoughts on that issue, but sometimes sharing our political opinions is a bit touchy, so that is not required.
- Iraq
- Universal Health care
- Social Security
- Education
- Crime
- Poverty
- Borders/Immigration
- Overcrowded Prisons
- Tax Cuts
- FEMA
- Homeland Security
- Environment
- Unemployment/jobs going overseas
Happy TT. Join the fun, more Thursday Thirteens are located here....
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Marshamlow
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10/04/2007 08:15:00 AM
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Thursday Thirteen
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Wednesday, October 03, 2007
ProBlogger Birthday Bash
PROBLOGGER is giving away $54,000 in cash and prizes between now an Monday. Click this logo to enter. I also want to take this opportunity to say that problogger.net is one of my favorite blogs, stop by and enter to win some prizes, but also be sure to bookmark this site so that you can add it to your daily read.
Posted by
Marshamlow
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10/03/2007 08:46:00 AM
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Custody: Women Rule, men drool

The other day Jeff made a comment about the Britney Spears - Keven Federline custody battle, at the time he was under the impression that Britney had gotten custody of their kids. Now I think she lost custody? I don't really pay attention to these things but Jeff feels that men tend to get the short end of the stick in custody battles, and I agree. I however, think this is a good thing, he thinks this is wrong.
All things being equal, meaning both parents are stable honorable people, women tend to be the care givers, they tend to put the kid's before their own. Isn't that the most sexist comment I have ever made? In our family, I am the primary care giver. I gave up working, to care for the kids and Jeff. Before that I always put the family before my jobs. I would only apply for jobs that fit into my role as parent, meaning good hours, health insurance, and ability to call in sick for kids. Which meant crappy, low wages, no advancement opportunity, doing things I hated. I always put the kids before the job, and my promotions would be affected by that. If I had an important career changing project and a sick kid, I would stay home with the sick kid and get screamed at by the boss.
Jeff on the other hand puts his career first. He is ensuring that we are fed, clothed, and have a roof over our head. If someone is sick, if someone misses their daddy, well they need to suck it up because his primary mission is to ensure our survival, not to hold his children's hands. He is damn good at ensuring our survival. He is a great father, very loving, very hard working, he gives our family everything he has. But, he takes care of himself first, his job second, and his family third.
Which means I do pretty much all the caring. From my perspective raising kids involves a great deal of grunt work. I do the majority of the grunt work. That doesn't make me a better parent or more important, it just means that if we were to split up -I would be the obvious choice to continue to do that grunt work. That is what custody is, the person who does the cooking, the laundry, the bathing, teaches kids manners, enforces rules, keeps their home clean, helps with homework, takes them to dr appts, makes sure they brush their teeth, make sure they get enough fresh air and sunshine, make sure they are learning all the things they need to learn to eventually leave home, telling them no... It isn't a contest of who the kids love best, or who is morally superior. Women almost always end up doing the grunt work. This is why women get custody.
I remember reading about New York city going after dead beat dads, some of these dad owed many thousands of dollars in child support. One of the dads in question, said that he had lost his job and was currently working for a lower wage. That paying the child support would cause him to be homeless. He could no longer afford to pay both the child support and his rent. So he chose his rent. I don't think a mother would do that, I am pretty sure a mother would chose to be homeless before she would allow her kid to be homeless. Because let's face it if the dad doesn't pay the child support how is the mom supposed to pay for the roof over the kid's head?
On an airplane, when I am told to put the oxygen mask on myself before my kids, I know that there is no way, I could do that. I don't care how many times they tell me or how logical their argument, my kid is getting the oxygen first. I know that a man came up with that rule. I know that my husband would put on his mask first, he would want to be prepared to take care of the family so he takes care of himself first. My brain just doesn't work that way. Which makes us a good team. But, if we were separated, I think kids need someone who would always put them first, make sure that they survive, that is a biological instinct in a mother. I think a father's biological instinct is for his survival first.
Jeff says I am sexist. What do you think? Is our current system of prejudice toward women in custody cases a good thing or a bad thing? Should more care be taken by the courts to spread custody more evenly between mothers and fathers? Are women biologically predisposed to be better parents?
Posted by
Marshamlow
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10/03/2007 07:12:00 AM
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Tuesday, October 02, 2007
BookWormsRus October books choices
For Kim...
The Road by Cormac McCarthy
A father and his son walk alone through burned America. Nothing moves in the ravaged landscape save the ash on the wind. It is cold enough to crack stones, and when the snow falls it is gray. They sky is dark. Their destination is the coast, although they don't know what, if anything, awaits them there. They have nothing: just a pistol to defend themselves against the lawless bands that stalk the road, the clothes they were wearing, a cart of scavenged food-and each other.
The Road is the profoundly moving story of a journey. It boldly imagines a future in which no hope remains, but in which the father and his son, "each the other's world entire," are sustained by love. Awesome in the totality of its vision, The Road is an unflinching meditation on the worst and the best that we are capable of: ultimate destructiveness, desperate tenacity, and the tenderness that keeps two people alive in the face of total devastation.
The Space Between Us by Thrity Umrigar
Poignant, evocative, and unforgettable, The Space Between Us is an intimate portrait of a distant yet familiar world. Set in modern-day India, it is the story of two compelling and achingly real women: Sera Dubash, an upper-middle-class Parsi housewife whose opulent surroundings hide the shame and disappointment of her abusive marriage, and Bhima, a stoic illiterate hardened by a life of despair and loss, who has worked in the Dubash household for more than twenty years. A powererful and perceptive literary masterwork, author Thrity Umrigar's extraordinary novel demonstrates how the lives of the rich and poor are intrinsically connected yet vastly removed from each other, and how the strong bonds of womanhood are eternally opposed by the divisions of class ad culture.
She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb
"Mine is a story of craving: an unreliable account of lusts and troubles that began, somehow, in 1956 on the day our free television was delivered..."
Meet Dolores Price. She's thirteen, wise-mouthed but wounded, having bid her childhood good-bye. Beached like a whale in front of her bedroom TV, she spends the next few years nourishing herself with the Mallomars, potato chips, and Pepsi her anxious mother supplies. When she finally rolls into young womanhood at 257 pounds, Dolores is no stronger and life is no kinder. But this time she's determined to rise to the occasion and give herself on more chance before really going belly up.
In his extraordinary coming-of-age odyssey, Wally Lamb invites us to hitch a wild ride on a journey of love, pain, and renewal with the most heartbreakingly comical heroine to come along in years. At once a fragile girl and a hard-edge cynic, so tough to love yet so inimitable loveable, Dolores is a poignantly real as our own imperfections. She's Come Undone includes a promise; you will never forget Dolores Price.
The Other Mother Gwendolen Gross
Gross's third novel (following Getting Out) documents the front lines of the Mommy Wars, but its real strength lies in exposing the complex inner battlefields motherhood can open up. Eight months pregnant Amanda, a successful children's book editor and dedicated New Yorker, picks up with her lawyer husband and moves to suburban Teaneck, N.J. Her new neighbor, Thea Caldwell, is a full-time mother of three who still lives in her childhood home and who arrives bearing brownies. When the newcomers take extended shelter in the Caldwells' basement following a damaging storm and, later, when Amanda hires Thea as her newborn's nanny, the growing intimacy between the two breeds resentment, bitterness and misunderstandings. The series of external crises designed to create tension and suspense are, in the end, less compelling than the women's own inner demons, revealed through alternating, and overlapping, first-person narration. Jersey resident Gross shows the strife between SAHMs (Stay at Home Moms) and WOTHs (moms who Work Outside the Home) to be a lot more nuanced than it's often portrayed.
Posted by
Marshamlow
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10/02/2007 08:58:00 AM
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Monday, October 01, 2007
Blog Carnival
Posted by
Marshamlow
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10/01/2007 09:26:00 AM
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