An Afternoon Walk from Hell

I have been feeling like crap lately. It is a physical, emotional, spiritual, bla. Don't know why. I thought I would do something to try and feel better. The first thing that came to mind was fresh air and exercise. On that note, one day last week I decided to take Lily for a walk down to the beach. Our dog really wanted to come along and I thought why not.

First I coated us with sunscreen, then mosquito repellent (while I hate doing that we have fair skins and a number of west Nile virus cases have occur ed in the local area). As we were heading out the front door Lily requested the opportunity to ride her big wheel instead of walking. Thanks, to her dad who let her ride her big wheel down to the water over the weekend.

We gathered her big wheel and proceeded to open the door. The dog shot out the door like a rocket and broke her retractable leash. Instead of just putting her back in the house, I coerced her to come back in the house with me by promising cheese. Gave cheese to the dog and to Lily. Got the other non-retractable leash and we were off.

Lily decided she did not want to peddle and was dragging her feet along the pavement to propel herself forward. I noticed she had chosen to wear her new shoes and thought we should probably change into the shoes she has already worn holes in, rather than ruining another pair of shoes. Back in the house, change shoes, back to the walk.

Lily's rides her bike without pedaling at this excruciating slow pace. The dog is pulling my arm out of the socket. It is hotter than hades. The sweat is starting to wet our hair a bit around the collar, even though we are barely moving. I start to get a bit more snippy than normal at the dog and at Lily. Lily tells me to be nice to Pixie, that she doesn't like it when I am mad. I am beginning to think that I am more grumpy now than I was before I started this remedy to feel better. No wonder I don't get out much.

From my front yard you can see the water, but there happens to be an alligator infested swampy area between my house and the actual beach. There is actually a couple of blocks between me and the alligators so no worries about alligators coming in my house and eating me in my sleep. (Even though I do have this nightmare). To get to the beach we have to walk down a block, over three blocks and down another block. Five blocks. Lily is a fast walker, but for some reason whenever we walk to the beach she becomes the world's slowest person. About two blocks into our walk Lily decides she no longer wants to shuffle her bike along and requests that I carry her bike while she walks. Which I do in hopes that we will go a bit faster. I am pretty sure it has taken at least four hours to walk these two blocks.

I am carrying the big wheel, holding the dog, and walking slower than a snail. Some how we manage to make it to the beach. We throw a couple of rocks into the water, we walk to the end of the pier, we see some pretty larks, we turn around and go home. Lily tells me she is so tired she cannot walk anymore. She begs me to carry her. She begins to that cry whine which lasts the next five hours it takes us to go home.

At one point, I shift the big wheel that I am still carrying to another position and the handle bars falls off. When I bend down to pick up the handle bars the back wheels fall off. Now I am trying to carry three pieces of the big wheel, hold the dog and I attempt to pick up Lily figuring that if I carry her this nightmare will eventually end.

A block into our walk home I ditch the three pieces of the big wheel on the side of the road, hoping that a lighter load will enable me to get home faster. I put Lily on my back and I walk as fast as I can the four remaining blocks home. By the time we get in the front door I am ready to die. Love is giving fresh cold water to the kid and the dog before yourself. We sip our water, watch the last five minutes of Teletubbies and jump in the car to retrieve the big wheel. On the way home I am thinking that cooking lunch doesn't really sound like fun, so I head the car toward McDonald's.

I notice that the conversation that Lily and I have on the way to McDonald's is silly and fun. We are giggling and laughing about all kinds of things. We come home and eat, I shower, she has a bath. By then it is time to go and get Mandy, etc. So the rest of the afternoon and evening I notice that my mood is indeed much better. But, was it worth it? Let's just say I haven't gone for another walk and I am back to feeling funky. This walk took over an hour, I am counting it as a walking day even though it was slow, carrying a kid has to count for something.